On the Links

Thomas, a friend, teeing off on a beautifully scenic hole.

Thomas and his wife. notice the long sleeves on both of them. His wife took off her gigantic sun-blocking visor for the picture. One thing's certain...these folks ain't dyin' of skin cancer. Reminds me of my grandpa hess---the only tan part of his body were his hands.

This is my caddy. Yes, I had a caddy. That's a first for me. She undressed a bit for the photo, too. Her pink whatever it is was closely tied around her face, making her look like she was wearing hijab with a hat. It was nice to have a caddy. She would point out to me where I should hit my putt every time and give me yardage estimates that seemed to be accurate. I beat everyone, so she must have known something.

Playing golf in Taiwan weather causes one to sweat quite profusely and so the private club provides a shower with a number of special creams, shaves, etc. after the round. It was a relaxing way to end the round. Its cool to to things in a foreign country that I regularly do at home and notice the differences and similarities. I'll have to tell you more about it, dad, since you're probably the only one who cares and knows about golf who reads this blog.

Engagement Feast

I am eating the menu. Each vertical line represents a separate dish that was served at an engagement lunch this afternoon. The dish pictured below only counts as one dish. Notice it has about 5 different foods on it. We had loads of fancy seafood. I guess the wedding feast is even bigger. I am amazed every day at how much these people can eat, given they are so small. The set-up is pretty clever--tradition has it that each guest leaves a certain amount of money for the couple in a red envelope. The better you know the couple, the more money you leave. This pays for the feast and leaves the couple with a little dough in their pockets. I just thought the whole thing was a bit excessive, but then, so is my body hair.

Now I Know What Hell Is

As we stepped over the rickety wooden bridge, it suddenly gave way, allowing us to freefall for no more than a foot. It was enough, though, to elicit sharp cries from my traveling partner, Molly. This marked our symbolic entrance to hell, found within a local temple. It functioned much more like a haunted house than a temple to me, but was definitely worthwhile. Grotesque statues put in motion the various punishments that one would receive for various sins while ghosts and headless corpses randomly flew from the ceiling. Molly wonders if the widespread usage of these punishments as threats to children in efforts to get them to behave only serves to make Taiwanese people more judgemental.

Love in Beijing

The paths people walk sometimes shock me. I met an extremely attractive white dude en route to Beijing who spoke impeccable Chinese (not that I could tell impeccable from atrocious). He just finished recording a 100 episode Chinese soap opera series, in which he plays a lead role. His path started when he served a Chinese speaking Mormon mission. Who would have thought he would end up where he is? Benji Battelle (if you are looking for some eye candy on facebook)

Then, take the dude above who is the most muscular man I've seen in Taiwan. He developed his guns by touring with the circus for a number of years. His specialty--spinning tops, which he now does in street performances around the country. This one he is getting ready to spin weighs at least 200 pounds (I couldn't even budge it off the ground). He let us try our hand at spinning the smaller tops. This was part of a snow-flower festival. The mountains literally looked covered in snow from all the white flowers.

WO SHI WEI SHEN!

A friend I met at the top of a mountain in Yang Ming Shan Nat'l Park. He's following a popular Taiwanese tradition of yelling to the universe from a tall mountain peak, announching who he is and what his deepest hopes and dreams are.

Where Dreams Are Made Of

Nannying takes my sister to an interesting place each summer, which is nice because then I have an excuse to go visit somewhere new. Last year it was Atlanta and this year the Big Apple. My brother Vinny was given the responsibility of being our alarm clock and awoke us each morning with a dramatic rendering of Jay-Z's Empire State of Mind. I think I'll hire someone to sing and dance me into consciousness each morning. Who needs coffee when you have your own human alarm clock?

Here are some things Vinny woke me up to see and do:

Ride in a limo for the first time. Don't I look thrilled? Our driver, Ziggy, was from the Ivory Coast and had no teeth.

The World Trade Center memorial...it was quite stirring...the thousand paper cranes were made as a tribute to peace a la Sadako Sasaki.

Lady Liberty and Ellis Island. While waiting in line I was guaranteed a place in heaven by a man with rainbow hair, a guitar and a huge smile. He asked if I'd ever kissed a black person. I says, "Yeah, but does that mean you're still offering?" I laid a big wet one on him and he then granted me a place in paradise. It was cool to see the story of immigration told so well in the Ellis Island museum.

A walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. We got to the other side with the intent to eat at a famous pizza place but the line was gigantic, so I read a plaque on the wall that said Walt Whitman was fired from a job because he opposed slavery. Good job, Walty.

Got freaking ripped.

Biked around Central Park. I was baffled by how huge this park was and no longer felt like I was in a city of 8.4 million people. The John Lennon memorial was RAD. A couple adoring fans were lining it with yellow and white flowers while another devotee was singing Imagine in the background. My sister, Paci and I seemed to be the only ones who were impressed. The rest of the family stood around looking at the word, "IMAGINE" engraved in fancy stone and commented disappointingly, "We came here for this? I could've just written that on a piece of paper."

Saw The Lion King on Broadway. Rafiki stole the show like always. The costumes were the most impressive.Had a techno-glow-stick dance party late one night in the apartment. Chief and Paci decorated themselves and we all said, "Wow!"

Had grilled salmon, asparagus and portobello mushrooms on the roof. I'll never listen to that James Taylor song in the same way.

Went to a Yankees game. A-ROD (A Ridiculously Overpaid Dink) was supposed to hit his 6ooth homerun, but instead the Blue Jays hit 600 homeruns themselves...or 4. I was reminded of how boring baseball really is. We had to exert ourselves to make it fun, hence the ponytail. Also, price-gouged, unhealthy stadium food is always a treat. How can 45,000 people come together to watch guys try to hit a ball with a stick, but a couple thousand people can't convene to watch a broadway production?

Natural History museum. I appreciated the way Teddy Roosevelt was memorialized here. He's the man. This place and the Museum of Modern Art (MOMA) contained overwhelming amounts of information and having my own ignorance revealed to me so powerfully reminded me that I have a lot to learn.

Probably my favorite part of the whole trip was seeing Mary Poppins on Broadway. My Dad, older sister and I have always been huge fans of the movie and since Paci is a nanny herself she also felt a connection to the story. We bought tickets the day of the show because they're significantly cheaper, however, we didn't sit together. We joyfully reunited outside the theater on Times Square with a crazy celebratory jump hug. We were all way stoked about the show. The songs are still in my head. Have you taken your spoonful of sugar today?

A model shoot on the beach at Fire Island. We also had a killer game of Ultimate Frisbee, I tried skimboarding for the first time and held a Horsehoe crab...aka a living fossil.

My two sistas and I on the ferry to Fire Island.

All we need is:

Ooh la la!

I stopped over in Paris on my way home from Morocco and was quite impressed but quite pissed off that a simple sandwich and bottle of water cost me 8.5 euros. I could eat like a king for at least a few days with that much money in Morocco. I could also urinate in public and beat children, both of which were pleasantly absent in Paris.

Some of the highlights: catching up on sleep and reading time on the lawn in front of the GIGANTIC Louvre, chocolate crepes, the view from the top of the Arc de Triomphe, the hip-hop dancers and freestyle soccer performers in front of the Eiffel Tower, fire dancers and roller-blade maniacs on a bridge over the Seine at night next to the Notre Dame (preposition overload) and awesome Indian food.